Hola friends! This week i wanted to just share with you a few thoughts, and a little bit of what i feel God has been teaching me in the past couple weeks. I find that God works and speaks in very odd ways most of the time, ways that are a little quirky, and ways that sometimes smack you in the head.
Sometimes God gives you every single thing you want, sometimes He blesses you with your dreams…dreams that you never thought would happen, but secretly hoped for. You know it’s God who gave you this blessing because it was too big to have ever happened without Him, and you know it’s God because His finger prints are all over it. In this time, the time of blessing, you are so happy…you are in the air floating on fluffy pink sparkly clouds (yes, my clouds are pink and sparkly). You feel so very grateful, and at peace. You are simply happy and joyful.
Then something happens, and God asks you (or really doesn’t even consult you) to give up what you love the most. He asks/tells you to let go of that special blessing you hold so dear. And you feel as if God is tearing your dreams to pieces. And it hurts like hell. You are left asking God why, if He gave you this wonderful happy blessing, did He just rip it out from your hands? You feel empty handed and confused.
That’s when we have two choices; we can either get angry and bitter at God, or lose hope. Or, we can trust. We can trust that God has a bigger and much better plan than we can see right then. The latter is the better, albeit harder, option. In the Bible when Job had just experienced his first test, and he learned that his sons and daughters had been killed, the bible says in verse 1:21 that he fell down in worship and said “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” And it says in verse 22 “In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing”. I don’t want to become bitter, and i don’t want to sin against God by accusing Him of hurting me. I want to have an attitude like Job, i want to praise God knowing that he gives and takes…but even in all that, He still loves me and is still worthy of my praise. I want to always fear God, and learn to trust him even when my dreams are crashing down around me, because He’s the only one i know that will pick me back up, dust me off, and lead me to new and greater pastures.
The other week i decided to help out at my churches summer camp for ages 10-12. I spent a few days there helping where needed and getting to know the other camp workers and the precious kids who were spending a week of their summer hearing about God’s love. During service one night the camp director was preaching and he did a little demonstration to make a point. He called a little boy up to the front and he began to ask the boy if he trusted him, the boy gave a quick nod, the director then reached into his wallet and gave the boy a dollar bill. He told the boy that he could keep the bill and could go sit back down. A little later the director called the boy back up and asked him the same question as before;” do you trust me?” Again the boy nodded, and the camp director proceeded to ask for the dollar bill back. The boy gave the dollar back and then the director tore it up. And “why not?” he said, “i gave you the dollar i can tear it up”. After the bill was in pieces he asked the boy one more time; “do you trust me now?” The boy said yes. Then, with a little trick of the hand, the director changed that dollar bill that was once torn to pieces, to a new and whole bill, and gave it to the boy to keep. As i sat in my chair i felt a little lump in my throat, he wasn’t supposed to be talking to me, i thought, he is supposed to be talking to 12 year old kids…and yet i felt like that was for me. I decided to brush it off and focus on other things, stashing the little moment in the back of my mind…maybe I’d think about it later…
Well, little did i know that “later” would be sooner than i thought, as something would happen after i got back from camp to smack me into really getting what God was trying to tell me. But first, a little back story; See a long time ago my grandparents, who i’m very close to, had given me something, they had promised it to me long ago and wanted me to have it. The thing they promised to me meant a lot only because i knew they wanted me to have it, and that made it so valuable and special to me. However, someone else also wanted this thing and decided to take it without so much as even asking. They did it in a very cold spirit and I’ll admit i was angry. I could have fought for it, i wanted to…but in my heart i knew that God had asked me to give it up, and instead of getting my hands dirty with anger i should let go and let Him deal with it. So i did. I gave up what had so much meaning to me, not the first time i had to do that…both times were crazy hard and painful.
Flash back to last week when i got back from camp, i was helping clean out my grandparents’ house so it would be ready to rent out soon, when Krystal and i came across three cute aprons in a dresser drawer of my grandma’s. The aprons were so cute and vintage looking, perfectly adorable! There was a white one with roses, and pretty brown one with a yellow flower print, and a light pink one which almost resembles a tutu (it’s a known fact that i adore tutus!), and we loved each one! Krystal and i are incessant bakers, it’s a passion of ours, and we have always talked about how we want to get some cute vintage looking aprons to bake in, so when we found my grandma’s old aprons it felt so right. We even found that we have a picture of my grandma cooking and wearing one of the aprons we found, how cool! Yes, it seemed as if God had placed those aprons in that dresser just for us to find, he knows us so well and he handpicked items to give us that match our personalities just perfectly. So, even though the thing that i was promised by my grandparents had been taken away from me, i got something equally as special….no, in fact, it’s more special, way more special because i know that God picked them for us to have.
God gives, and God takes away…but if you trust him, and wait, He will give you back what you had in a more special and real way. That’s what i learned from that demonstration at camp. God will not leave you empty handed. That’s what i learned by finding those aprons. God knows you, He really deeply, truly knows your heart and soul. He knows those little quirks and funny odd things you love and that excite you, and He will give you things that match up with that…He gives you things that fit your personality perfectly, and that compliment who you are. I believe in a God of restoration, and i believe in a God that i can trust with my whole heart and all my dreams and hopes. My every desire is in the hands of The Almighty God, and they are safe there. “He will give you the desires of your heart” is what the bible says, so we know it’s true. We just have to trust God, trust and delight in Him, and He will restore the things that have been torn apart. God will restore and give back to you what you lost. He did with Job, so why not you?
Trust and believe my friends, your restoration is on its way.
“Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.” -Psalm 37:4 (Amplified Bible)
“Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God’s Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don’t know how or what to pray, it doesn’t matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.” – Romans 8:26-28 (The Message)
“Lean on, trust in, and be confident in the Lord with all your heart and mind and do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know, recognize, and acknowledge Him, and He will direct and make straight and plain your paths.” – Proverbs 3:5-6 (Amplified Bible)